Anger Management in Halifax
Getting help for anger from a psychologist
Looking for anger management in Halifax? Help is available in Nova Scotia.
What is anger? It may seem a bit odd to even ask this question. After all, everyone has been angry many times during their lives - it is something we can all relate to. In fact there is a pretty good chance that you have experienced anger within the past week or maybe even today.
While we all know what anger feels like, understanding it and being in control of anger (rather than letting it control us) is more of a challenge. The good news is that while it is impossible to completely avoid becoming angry or frustrated (they can actually be useful emotions when properly directed), it is possible to learn anger management skills, reduce the intensity of the anger you experience, and stay in control of what you say and what you do when you are angry.
What is anger? It may seem a bit odd to even ask this question. After all, everyone has been angry many times during their lives - it is something we can all relate to. In fact there is a pretty good chance that you have experienced anger within the past week or maybe even today.
While we all know what anger feels like, understanding it and being in control of anger (rather than letting it control us) is more of a challenge. The good news is that while it is impossible to completely avoid becoming angry or frustrated (they can actually be useful emotions when properly directed), it is possible to learn anger management skills, reduce the intensity of the anger you experience, and stay in control of what you say and what you do when you are angry.
The three elements of anger
Because anger often happens so quickly it is easy to forget that it is actually made up of three interconnected elements:
1) The Emotional Experience - This is the experience we notice the most. When we are angry all other emotions seem to fade into the background. Have you ever said "I have mixed feelings about that" or felt two ways about the same situation? For example, when trying something a little dangerous for the first time it is common to feel both nervous and excited simultaneously. Anger however, does not like to share the floor with any other emotion. It has a way of overriding everything else and screaming "Nothing else matters - pay attention to me!!!” Incidentally, an important part of anger management involves paying attention to other emotions when anger is yelling the loudest for your attention.
2) The Physiological Experience - When angry, the body prepares a response to perceived threats or stressors. Heart rate and blood pressure increases, hot sensations and a reddening of the skin occurs, muscles tighten, jaws and fists are clenched, sweating increases, pacing starts, breathing becomes short and shallow, and numerous other simultaneous physiological reactions take place.
From an evolutionary perspective this all makes sense - when faced with a threat our early ancestors had to prepare to fight or defend themselves in order to survive. Unfortunately, for people with anger management problems this "fight response" is triggered either in the absence of a true threat or when the threat is far less serious than the person perceives it to be. Overreacting to feeling insulted or disrespected is a common anger management challenge for men, but change is certainly possible.
3) The Cognitive Experience - Anger is also a mental experience related to the way events are interpreted. Common beliefs that trigger anger include:
● I have been treated unfairly or disrespected
● Other people are inconsiderate, unfair, and out to get me
● I shouldn't have to deal with this frustration
● My reaction is justified…anyone would respond like this
● Other people are stupid, lazy, worthless, etc.
● Someone intentionally tried to harm me
● My point of view is correct - everyone else is wrong
1) The Emotional Experience - This is the experience we notice the most. When we are angry all other emotions seem to fade into the background. Have you ever said "I have mixed feelings about that" or felt two ways about the same situation? For example, when trying something a little dangerous for the first time it is common to feel both nervous and excited simultaneously. Anger however, does not like to share the floor with any other emotion. It has a way of overriding everything else and screaming "Nothing else matters - pay attention to me!!!” Incidentally, an important part of anger management involves paying attention to other emotions when anger is yelling the loudest for your attention.
2) The Physiological Experience - When angry, the body prepares a response to perceived threats or stressors. Heart rate and blood pressure increases, hot sensations and a reddening of the skin occurs, muscles tighten, jaws and fists are clenched, sweating increases, pacing starts, breathing becomes short and shallow, and numerous other simultaneous physiological reactions take place.
From an evolutionary perspective this all makes sense - when faced with a threat our early ancestors had to prepare to fight or defend themselves in order to survive. Unfortunately, for people with anger management problems this "fight response" is triggered either in the absence of a true threat or when the threat is far less serious than the person perceives it to be. Overreacting to feeling insulted or disrespected is a common anger management challenge for men, but change is certainly possible.
3) The Cognitive Experience - Anger is also a mental experience related to the way events are interpreted. Common beliefs that trigger anger include:
● I have been treated unfairly or disrespected
● Other people are inconsiderate, unfair, and out to get me
● I shouldn't have to deal with this frustration
● My reaction is justified…anyone would respond like this
● Other people are stupid, lazy, worthless, etc.
● Someone intentionally tried to harm me
● My point of view is correct - everyone else is wrong
The consequences of anger
While not all expressions of anger are unjustified, the probability of negative consequences increases dramatically as the anger escalates, becomes more frequent, or more uncontrollable. In such cases anger can contribute to:
● Physical injuries (e.g., punching a wall, aggressive driving, fighting)
● Health consequences (e.g., high blood pressure, heart disease, weakened immune system)
● Poor relationships and divorce / seperations / breakups
● Physical violence and abuse
● Lost friendships
● Work and career difficulties
● Legal problems
● Physical injuries (e.g., punching a wall, aggressive driving, fighting)
● Health consequences (e.g., high blood pressure, heart disease, weakened immune system)
● Poor relationships and divorce / seperations / breakups
● Physical violence and abuse
● Lost friendships
● Work and career difficulties
● Legal problems
Anger management treatment
Over the years there have been numerous theories and treatments for anger management - some more successful than others. For example, one approach involves the intense expression of anger - yelling, punching pillows, hitting a punching bag until exhausted, etc. While these methods may have a certain intuitive appeal (release the anger in a safe place so that it won't be expressed in other situations), there is little scientific research to support the effectiveness of these therapies.
Today, the most common treatment approach for anger management is cognitive-behavioural therapy which may involve:
● Identification of specific anger triggers and the common maladaptive responses
● Relaxation training
● Cognitive interventions to change anger-inciting thought patterns
● Social / communication interventions to reduce the possibility of negative interpersonal interactions
● Behavioral interventions to reduce actions which are seen as aggressive or confrontational by others
Today, the most common treatment approach for anger management is cognitive-behavioural therapy which may involve:
● Identification of specific anger triggers and the common maladaptive responses
● Relaxation training
● Cognitive interventions to change anger-inciting thought patterns
● Social / communication interventions to reduce the possibility of negative interpersonal interactions
● Behavioral interventions to reduce actions which are seen as aggressive or confrontational by others
Anger is treatable.
You can learn to control the thoughts that lead to anger and the behaviors that result from anger.
Anger management in Halifax, Nova Scotia
If you would like to receive help for anger management (and live in the areas of Halifax, Bedford, or Dartmouth) please read more about therapy and counselling, my treatment approach, and feel free to contact me if you have any questions at all, or if you would like to set up an initial consultation.
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